Saturday, 9 August 2014

Black Orchid


Lass Productions ‏@21stcenturylass  I imagine you, freshly squeezed screwdriver in hand dictating tweets to your butler #WhatWhatWhat

I'll be taking a cocktail to my bath alright! #Squiffy #Smutty
 


Gareth Kavanagh ‏@Garethothevworp That still makes it look like they were never sober during the filming of this one!


Only orange juice for the children...!

Gareth Kavanagh ‏@Garethothevworp Give over. Adric was on the White Lightening the minute the Doctor was in the secret passage.

Explains why he had to line his stomach so much. Eating's cheating.

Gareth Kavanagh ‏@Garethothevworp Adric's a pro. Milkshakes, the lot.  








Odd start. Is this definitely episode 1? Some poor sod's being strangled. Was that not a cliffhanger?

Mark Walker @Mark_Walker ·  I think it's a brilliant way to start an episode! 

In the next room Nyssa lying in bed with a funny haircut...


...and there's some guy looking a bit lippy in the room opposite.


The TARDIS arrives on Earth for the 2nd story in a row. 


Tegan's decided to stay. Make your mind up.


"You can stop trying to get me back to Heathrow!" Nah, get rid. Whinger.
It was funnier *not* to tell Tegan she'd tucked her skirt into her knickers, they decided.

They're at a railway station at 3pm 11th June 1925. The trains aren't late at this point, thank you Doctor Beeching.

The sequences on film look fantastic. People moaned about the colours on the restoration, didn't they? Looks great!

Parker from Thunderbirds has turned up to take the TARDIS crew to Downton Abbey or something.


Parker seems to recognise Nyssa...

Well, that's not cricket, is it? Oh, wait, yes it is. 

George Downton thinks Nyssa is his fiancee. Pretty sure she'd have remembered that, fella.

Cranleigh's crappy cricketers are completely corpsing...

Luckily the Doctor comes highly recommended by Smutty. Apparently.

So the crickety one finally gets to play cricket. 


He's putting in some Demon Runs there. Arf arf.



Nyssa is the spit of Cranleigh's fiancee Ann; that must have been her earlier in the bedroom. 


The Doctor's come in as a ringer to win the game for the hopeless home team. Take that, The Lodger!

All the guest cast are wonderful, Michael Cochrane, Barbara Murray and Moray Watson in particular.

Mark Walker @Mark_Walker · feel a bit like this episode was created just so Davison could play a bit of cricket!

You may well think that, I couldn't possibly... HOWZAT!! The joy on Davison's face when he bowls someone out for real is hilarious. He's as surprised as anyone!



According to at least one critic, the 5th Doctor's love of cricket makes ALL of "thunderingly racist." EPIC FACEPALM.


Oh, boo! Now we're back in a studio.

Lame gag namedropping "The Master"... W.G. Grace.

Everyone's obssessed with Worcester. Saucy!

Cranleigh gets the drinks in. Lemonade for the Doctor, a screwdriver for Tegan & "orange juice for the children".

Gareth Kavanagh ‏@Garethothevworp So screwdrivers all round in other words. It's a school disco!

Yeah, odd the way they persist in pretending Adric & Nyssa are in their mid-teens.


I'm sure the "Worcester! Have you an uncle Bertie?" is supposed to be a PG Wodehouse joke.

They should have called this story The Two Nyssas.

The Black Orchid was found by Lady C's other son, who was lost up the Amazon, blah blah, it's him isn't it?

Found it in the Orinoco? The Womble?


Sir Robert thought they were wearing costumes. Because they sure as hell don't look like real clothes.

The gang are all invited to a fancy dress party and retire to guest rooms to change.


The Doctor's in one room, Nyssa & Tegan another, and Adric is conspicuous by his absence.


Mark Walker @Mark_Walker · absence is the best thing for Adric


Teenage boy left on his own in a room to change his outfit? Yeah, you're thinking what I'm thinking.


You can see straight away Davison hates that costume he's been given.


Tegan gets her Charleston out...
 "Call that dancing? It's SHIT!" Tegan regretted letting Nyssa have a sip of her screwdriver.
The Doctor gets out of his whites & into a silk dressing gown. Is this his new costume? What would Hartnell say?


Nyssa & Ann wear the same outfit to cause a bit of mischief. Tegan thinks it's a great hoot. Easily pleased.

You can tell the two apart because Ann has a mole and Nyssa only three badgers and a ferret.

So far this episode, Tegan's displayed hitherto unsuspected knowledge of horticulture and period dances. How convenient! How out of character!

James VHS Gent @EducationNinja ·  A whore to culture? :o

Gareth Kavanagh @Garethothevworp ·  Top schools down in Arse Creek, Australia. She's more than likely the star of Arse Creek High's botany and hoofer classes.

The Fourth Dimension @Mike_J_Lord ·  she can also speak an ancient aboriginal language even the TARDIS can't translate, don't underestimate her!



Someone's nicked Davison's costume. He'll be quite pleased with that.

He gets back from his shower to find the gurgler's passage gaping open.


Tegan's got the party started with a few screwdrivers...

The Doctor gropes around in the dark.

The Two Nyssas present their double butterfly act.

Latoni arrives fashionably late to tell Madame Max the madman in the attic is on the loose.

Lost in the house, the Doctor catches up on some reading.

Sir Robert tells Tegan she needs someone closer to her own age.



She hears a tune that sounds proper Bo and busts some moves. 

After a bit of shuffling on the spot, Adric dives into the buffet face first. 

After pinching the Doctor's costume, the gurgler grabs Ann for a dance which allows Adric to go back to quaffing sarnies.

The Doctor's still wandering around in his dressing gown like an unsuspecting Barker...
 The Doctor was beginning to think that neither of the two Nyssas was going to show up.


He finds a dead body in the cupboard. Every party should have one.


The gurgler takes Ann inside then won't let her go...

"Let me go whoever you are!" Come off it, everyone else figured it out as soon as Tegan referred to George.

Mark Walker @Mark_Walker · The Butler puts down something he could've smashed clown guy over the head with then gets killed. Clever.

She panics and faints! Cliffhanger!

So neither the Doctor nor any of the 3 companions in jeopardy there.

Are we supposed to believe that was Nyssa? I suppose there's jeopardy in that the Doctor will obviously be blamed.




The Doctor bumps into Lady C and Latoni, and shows them the body.

Lady C. doesn't want to upset the party, but promises to call the police when all the suspects have left. Okey dokey, then.

Sir Robert tries to give Tegan a hoot.

The gurgler puts the harlequin cossie back in the Doctor's room. Clever.

Then Latoni recaptures him when he watches Ann in her sleep. Not so clever.

"Some brandy will help calm you down." Good stuff, Lady C.

Adric's put his bloody star badge on top of his fancy dress costume. Oik. He's eaten more sandwiches in 1 minute than Pertwee ate in the whole of the Sea Devils!


  "Send out for more sandwiches... It just won't stop eating!"

 "Sir, there are no sandwiches left in THE WHOLE OF ENGLAND!"
"But he's STILL hungry!"

You'd think Adric hadn't eaten since that bit of bread in the rate he's putting it away.

Both Nyssa and Tegan have called Adric on being a greedy stuffer in close succession but he ploughs on. The lad's a machine.


Now wearing the harlequin costume, the Doctor walks straight into trouble; blamed for bumping off the butler. 


Fake Nyssa is screeching about Tristan Farnon being a murderer or somesuch.

Lady C. fails to give the Doctor his alibi. Who could she possibly be covering for?

More bollocks scripting of the Davison era; insists on remaining incognito then tries to get out of trouble by going on about Time-Lords and the TARDIS to all and sundry. Ridiculous.


"There's more to this than meets the eye!" Sir Robert suspects Decepticon involvement.

The Doctor's companions spring to his defence with spirited impersonations of chocolate teapots.

Of course the body upstairs has been moved when they go to look.

Now Tristan's wibbling on about Brazilians, while Cranleigh takes a call from "Smutty".


Love Davison's resignedness on being arrested. "That's very kind of you!"

"Ooh, I've written meself into a corner here, Eric, how do I get the other characters to believe the Doctor, now?"
"Leave it to me, Dudders."
*types* NYSSA: Why don't you show them the TARDIS, Doctor? 

"Job done. Now to the pub." 


Tegan is thrilled when the Doctor suggests another trip to the choo-choos. Look, you can tell.

Unfortunately, the TARDIS isn't in the lost luggage.

Then, off-screen, the truth comes out as we rejoin Charles reacting to Lady C's confession and the Doctor & co. did bugger all to solve things.


At the station, the Doctor lets the local constabulary pile into the TARDIS. "Strike me pink!"

The Space Pirate @SpacePirateOz · Just bung 'em in the TARDIS! The Roaring 20s were a very open-minded and progressive time ya know!

George has had enough of his post-murder nap but Latoni stashes the key in the cracks of the floorboards before he croaks.



Nowadays the psychic paper short cuts all these capture/escape & mistaken identity storylines, but somehow that's an expediency, whereas waltzing this week's guest characters round the TARDIS is unforgiveable IMO.

Unable to find the key, George has started a bonfire. Indoors. Now who's the clown? 


The Doctor takes them all back to the house via TARDIS. 

Ann learns the truth, and George leaps to freedom...

 ...but it's the wrong girl he runs into.

George the firestarter grabs Nyssa and tries to get her high.


The Doctor and Charles make it to opposite ends of the roof to try to talk George down.

The Doctor shows him that the real Ann is down below.

George releases Nyssa.


Was there ever any question as to who Davison's favourite companion was?

Rather stupidly, Charles lurches towards him, causing him to fall and die.


Oh well, that's all wrapped up then, cheers!

It is actually a nice touch that for once they stay for the funeral. 

"The fancy dress costumes, we can keep them?"

"No, I really want to be reminded of George's death. Berk."

Despite that lazy shortcut, I actually think it's a fun story & a lot better than the cast seem to think!

But it's largely held up by the film sequences.

The Space Pirate @SpacePirateOz ·  It's a great little 2 parter, a very welcome return to the historical format of the 60's



TTFN! K.

Coming Soon... Engines of War

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